Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
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