I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
