Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
