Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Randomize