I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
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4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
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I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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