this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
