I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
