Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
No subtext here. People are naked.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Randomize