am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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