It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
