I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
This show inspires me to have sex in space
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
