You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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