anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
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I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
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I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating