i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Randomize