the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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