She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize