thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Randomize
