Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
