I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize