no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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