how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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