SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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