He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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