I wish I could teleport
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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