question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize
