First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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