How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
