Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(440): View more from Ohio

I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman

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(303): View more from Colorado

So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.

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(516): View more from New York

A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.

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(256): View more from Alabama

Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(605): View more from South Dakota

Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."

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(309): View more from Illinois

I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.

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(913): View more from Kansas

I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."

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