Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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