Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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