My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
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