I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
