one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
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