Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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