She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
you never un-have a 4some
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
