I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize