how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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