He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
All the doctor said was why
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
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