is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Are my feet made of real feet?
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
