Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize