Fine. I'll sleep in my office
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
