? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
pray to the hookup gods
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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