Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
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