Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
