But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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