I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
The beer is more important than you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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