Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
