I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Randomize
