omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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