is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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